oy oy oy

It has been awhile my dear friends, awhile indeed. I’m settling in well I believe, I have a very nice but not very comfortable job lined up for the near future. It will be nice to have income of my own coming in once more, I’ll be able to get back into the groove of things, not have to use someone else’s laptop….

I’m already working on plans to rebuild my computer, I doubt it will cost alot unless I want to be a freak. Mainly though I have other needs that I am putting in front of getting a computer for the moment (blasphemy I know) but I’d like to get come camping / hiking stuff so I can experience the great outdoors in all of it’s terrifying beauty.

I also plan to hopefully be moved out of Kyle and Leslie’s apartment by Thanksgiving, thats what I’m shooting for. I think if my checks are of a decent amount I might splurge a little bit and either get an apartment in the same complex as the one were in now OR one kind of further away but more expensive but almost double the space. I guess for the moment it’s all just conjecture until I find out if I got this job or not, I have a good feeling about it.

I wanted to post about some kind of academic thing but I’m pretty tired and I need to do a bunch of stuff at the bank tomorrow and call the HR dept at my hopefully job place of employment so unfortunetly I will not be doing that this time, though there is much to talk about! Next time though, look forward to it.

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Tribes: Ascend

Well, well, well, we find ourselves here once more, eh old chap? Now I know I have talked about it before and I will again when the game actually comes out but for now I wish to go over it again. Now that Hi-rez have shown videos and people have actually played the game I think I’m going to chime in even though I have not.

While fishing around the internet I’ve found alot of complaints about the game, many completely justified. I shall list them for you in no particular order, ones with no basis I will put my response behind in parenthesis:

  • FTP (okay I don’t understand, because its free you’re afraid that the population will be huge with all these n00bs who don’t deserve to play will much stuff up? Get off you’re high horse.)
  • Micro Transactions (It’s not pay to win it’s an express lane to get weapons [I’ll talk about that in a bit])
  • 2 weapons per armor type.
  • Preset loadouts.
  • No mods
  • No private servers
Okay first I want to talk about micro transactions. As stated about they seem to be an express lane to get weapons which you’ll unlock naturally as time goes on, think TF2. Generally, I don’t like it, and alot of other people do not either because yes, one of the main appeal of Tribes was having everything from the get go. I guess I’ll also talk about the preset loadouts. Which is to say you wont get to make custom presets for yourself, I REALLY dont like the idea of this, and by “really” I actually got red in the face when I learned this.
I used several different light loadouts playing the compshop way back in the day. Seeing as I played a sniper I had different ones for different situations. I guess I wont be able to just switch my weapons on the fly to change how I want to play. Also, I guess I wont be switching weapons because I can only have two at a time, plus a melee weapon which of COURSE is insta kill.
More to the point after watching the videos from Quakecon (go check them out) I can say it LOOKS like it’s Tribes which is honestly more than I could say about Vengeance. No I wont talk about that abomination here. It does look like they are trying to make a new Tribes game, and I hope they succeed, but after reading online, finding people talking about it at Quakecon I can honestly say my resolve is shaken. It’s not that I don’t think it can be done but following in other companies footsteps instead of making your own?
Now I am NOT against microtransactions, quite the opposite, I believe under the right circumstances they can be good and amazing. Which is to say follow TF2 for it, don’t add anything you cant get normally in the game anyways, or if you do make sure it’s something completely cosmetic, not say $15 map packs.
I just don’t understand why it’s so hard to remake Tribes? How hard can it be to just remake Tribes 2? I just honestly cannot fathom it, and as time goes on I just get madder. If this one fails I mean honestly just let the franchise die, let some indie person take care of Tribes and actually listens to the community.

cable…

Well…here we are. I hope you will excuse any spelling mistake or punctuation errors that you might find on this one, went indoor rock climbing and my hands are, for better a term “almost completely unusable” right now so I hope you will bear with me as the strength required to lift this laptop unto my legs was monumental. (editors note: dont worry seeing as this is a multiday process, I have since regained access to my hands.)

So today I’ll probably (and by probably I mean I will) talk about two channels that I once dearly loved before they tried to rip my throat out. Luckily I was old enough as to see through their immense bullshit and need their sick fetish desire for ratings that they would abscond from what made them what they are. More of a blight now than I had ever dreamed.

I of course talk about Discovery and the History channel. Here Allow me to label some from both of these … “respectable” companies:

Discovery you go first:

  • American Chopper
  • Auction Kings
  • American Logger
  • Deadliest Catch
  • Mythbusters
  • Dirty Jobs
  • Swamp Brothers
  • Swamp Loggers
  • Life
  • Gold Rush Alaska
Now this is a small bit of their programming. And that said I DO Like Dirty Jobs, Mythbusters and Life the rest of this? Look I don’t even know what I’m looking at, and to be honest even though I like Dirty Jobs I don’t feel it’s a show that Discovery needs to show. But every now and then they return to their true nature and I feel it is good. But I don’t see why they are so enigmatic about everything that they do. Why in the holy hell are there more episodes of Deadliest Catch than Into the Universe with Stephen Hawking or more things like Shark Week?
To be honest when I was still in school (Middle and High) I adored the Discovery channel and in fact was one of maybe three or four channels I watched because it fascinated me and helped me develop this passion I have for Science that I do. Discovery helped nurture my love of it, and now it’s like a heroin addicted boyfriend/girlfriend sucking the life out of me having watched it fall so far.
When Mythbusters did so well I thought it would be a throwback to their old days after they began to go astray. Nope. All that they did was try to recreate Mythbusters for  more action packed shows tried to clone it but with more Michael Bay EXPLOSIONS! “Well that failed… what about a reality show that deals with auctions? BRILLIANT!” Science!
It is without a doubt one of the reasons I stopped watching TV, look I like Mythbusters and I’ll watch it online or buy the DVD’s when I eventually get a good job because I want to show them this is what they should be doing. I shouldn’t be learning more from Thousand Ways to Die on Spiked. It shouldn’t be a contest, I should be getting science crap from discovery, and I honestly don’t see why Discovery needs to suddenly be some kind of Michael Bay clone from quasi manliness.
Oh History Channel let’s not forget about you, lets see what you have to offer now a days shall we?
  • Ice Road Truckers
  • Ancient Aliens
  • The Bible code
  • Life After People
  • Swamp People
  • Monster Quest
  • Only in America with Larry the Cable Guy
  • Pawn Stars
  • UFO Hunters
  • Ax Men
History Channel in my opinion is far, far worse than Discovery Channel. I think it has to do with them being like “oops we did ALL of history put on some more pawn stars!” On the main site that lists all of their shows not a single one of the ads was for a legitimate educational show. Now there are some shows on there that ARE educational. The thing is that, almost all of them were time specific shows and I dont mean during the day I mean things pertaining to Independence Day and Christmas and the like.
Almost nothing History shows now is of any educational use…oh unless you wake up at six in the morning. Lovely.
You know much like Discovery I got my love of history .. well… through the History channel. I loved watching stuff about WW2 and although I know that it seems it’s been over done I would still take it over the diatribe they have now. Every time Ancient Aliens is on or UFO Hunters I literally feel the need to vomit profusely. Or anything having to do with the future thats not in the context of history. I know perhaps I’m bashing rocks together but one would think they would at LEAST stick with what their name is at least based on.
Now I don’t even really watch TV outside of the occasional Mythbusters or Deadliest Warrior for my “educational” needs then I have Adult Swim for pretty much everything else, and what it doesn’t satisfy Comedy Central does.
I cant imagine a time way back when Discovery ever would have put a man on who would say shit like “I dunno, therefore aliens.” that is of course paraphrased by the great GAT. A man unable to just be able to think like a decent normal human being and sees the obvious truth that the pyramids were made by aliens so that they could mine gold and cover their planet with it.
Honestly though I’m not surprised at all. Thats just some of the foul bile that these two seem to spit up. Instead of saying “yea….that not science.” they fully endorse these madmen and influence kids growing up that saying unfounded bullshit (pardon my french) like this with zero understanding on how anything rudimentary works that it’s somehow okay. That it’s somehow okay to say that that has just as much merit as actual science. (editors note: it doesnt.)
But it’s okay because we have shows watching how pawn shops work, which we had before with antique roadshow where people weren’t ripped off by giving away family heirlooms away for fifty bucks. Gone are the days that I learn anything on cable. And when I get my own place I’m not gonna skimp out and get BBC’s Nova and the Science channel. I’m deeply disappointed in these two who only want higher ratings and forsake the very grounds on which they were founded. Maybe they’ll take ques from other networks and have midget ghost talkers who communicate with dead pets next. All I can do is cross my fingers.

dat dang u do

I am perhaps a very vocal proponent of pseudosciences as much as I am about other things in life that have to do with conspiracy theories and (pardon my French) bullshit anecdotes. You see I am a scientist at heart, and with that comes scrutiny and skepticism that goes with it. Some of my friends do believe in some of this bullshit and it harms me greatly.

Now I will say without a doubt there have been some unexplainable terrifying experiences  in my life, but I don’t automatically chalk it up to ghosts, UFO sightings, angels or demons, the boogeyman or anything else Stephen King usually writes about. Now I’m not saying I wouldn’t believe in any of these things if the proof was there I’m just saying if you cant show me anything…ANYTHING to the contrary, why should I believe you?

If ghosts are the most terrifying thing that has happened to you I suggest you get out more. The most terrifying thing that has ever happened to me was after being awake for almost 24 hours and having a semi cut me off and almost not reacting in time. When you come close to you’re own mortality I believe there is nothing more frightening.

Some people suggest UFO’s are real, that were being visited by aliens. Amazing, just amazing. Now people talk about how monumentous life is and if there were aliens I can see why they’d want to visit us, I’m not going to say that they would want peace or some crap like that because look at our society as a whole. No. Really do, please do. Step back and take in all the genocides no one but George Clooney cares about, people are bigoted, racist, and generally manipulative to a degree that truly disgusts me.

Would I want to visit that? To explore that any further? Why? When I can just look through the window and see people how they truly are anyways. But no, these aliens come down and shove “tracking devices” into people, probe people, kill our cows and mutilate them horribly. And above that wipe peoples minds about their experience? I don’t buy it. Why? Why go through all that effort? What could we possibly do? We cant even land on our own moon anymore.

That aside I do hope that there IS life out there, but knowing how old the light from the stars themselves are, wondering how many of those stars are dead now, how far they would need to have come to kill some of our cows and leave geometry patterns in our crops. Niiice.

But theres all of this evidence right? Pictures and shit? No. Pictures don’t count for anything anymore and heres why: Every single day more graphics design students cant find jobs because they’re flooding the market because I dunno, art is great or something. The tools are made easier to use every year to manipulate photos, I mean if you give some of these people enough time I’ve seen someone remake the Mona Lisa in paint. PAINT the program not actual paint. Photos don’t mean anything anymore.

Real proof IS necessary, well what constitutes real proof? Some kind of hard fact that can be studied by scientists to be verified. But you got these freaks on Discovery…Discovery don’t even get me started on it and the History channel now, I’ll save that for later, but these freaks go onto these shows and spout nonsense. And the child like part of me says “WOOOOW thats amazing.” because its discovery channel they wouldn’t have completely insane people on here right? “WRONG” and my scientific side slaps the crap out of it.

I mean you can say anything that you want, about how vaccines give kids autism, or the fluoride in water is brain washing us, maybe that we didn’t land on the moon. That is fine but when you start corrupting people to believe in lies thats not okay, thats not scientific. You are entitled to you’re opinions but you are not entitled to facts.

Whats something else I can talk about? How about ghosts aka the spirits of the departed. Same thing if not even easier to manipulate the data with, since no one actually knows how to track them or anything like that, they have this hocus pocus magic act with “sensors” and all this electronic crap to try to make it seem more plausible. Now I will admit that I get scared sometimes, often times in my youth, the dark is scary and you’re mind jumps to conclusions.

No. I hear some of you crying thats not true I know what I saw, you mean like people seeing Jesus (editors note: I’m doing my damnedest to keep religion and politics OUT of my blog. I know it wont work forever as I know I will be forced to drag it in sometime.) on a piece of toast, or a walmart receipt. The human mind is insanely good at finding patterns when really there aren’t any. Why do you think machines and computers have been having a damn hard time breaking into that field? It’s because your brain NEEDS to see these things, and when it’s dark and distorted what do you see?

I think an excellent test ( although cruel and terrifying) would be as a child grows up to never show him anything on ghosts, never let him hear ghost stories and junk like that, and bring him into these situations where people have seen ghosts or some crap and see what happens to someone untainted by societies influence on it. How do you think he would react?

An example is as follows:

What do you see?

More than likely you see a man caressing a woman from behind. Do you see the dolphins? The whole image is made with dolphins in fact, children don’t see the loving couple and instead see the dolphins because they have no experiences as such. And I would be interested to see what the outcome of such a thing would be. You see what you’re brain want’s you to see and probably not whats right under you’re face. I expect someone to say “I saw the dolphins!” Yea? Screw you I don’t believe you, this is the internet pal I could say I’m the freaking President.

It’s all just conjecture and you’re mind playing games on you because your brain while marvelous and an engineering marvel is dumb as hell. It cuts corners all the time! Look it up, did you know you’re blind for roughly five minutes every day? While your brain is advanced it is still linked to what we were millions of years ago, and still thinks it needs to survive.

I understand the allure of these things, I do honestly. But if no reputable scientist has picked it up any of these things yet there might be a reason for that, and don’t say that no reputable scientist would want to, because if they were right imagine the fame and infamy! Scientists will always fight each other but until you can show something other than photos and junk data no one is going to take you seriously because you aren’t proceeding scientifically.

But honestly it’s your life and if you want to waste it in a old creepy house or standing out in a corn field be my guest. But don’t get mad at me if I don’t believe you or tell you its all in your mind. I expect to be hated on for this post but whatever. Please explain to me in scientific terms why either of these things are real.

a cry for help

Well seeing as I don’t have a job for the moment I’ve been trying my hand at what is called one of the hardest games ever made. Dwarf Fortress. I’m not gonna say I’m pro at it because I’m not by any stretch of the word because lets face it this IS dwarf fortress were talking about. Basically I couldn’t play the vanilla version of it, mainly because I dont wish to learn how to decode the Matrix and help Neo fight. ASCII can seriously go eat a damn dick, I get it it’s the only way you can show shit without my laptop dying. (BTW I am totally running it off of my external hard drive so I can take it anywhere.)

This is how it generally looks:

"I can't even see the Matrix anymore."

No please….just no. Look what I can tell you is I can see the roads, the dwarves the grass and the water. Besides that I’m just as lost as you are on this. So I downloaded a handy pack called: LazyNewbPack it comes with some new tilesets one being Ironhand and while it’s not great you can definitely see things and understand them, well more basic of things. I actually do see into the Matrix on this one and I can pretty much tell whats going on, since it is what I’ve learned off of.

only taken to show the difference I promise.

Oh god. So yea there you go. Dwarf Fortress is at it’s heart a story telling machine, sure you pretty much rule over you’re dwarves and lose in the most horrendous ways possible, but that’s just part of the story. Remember: Losing is fun! I will admit for awhile I was getting furious at my butcher dwarf who wouldn’t kill cats and dogs, even though I would tell him to find a live animal and designate them for slaughter. It was important to keep a dwarf from going insane, which ended up happening because my butcher wouldn’t do his damn job! Oh well I figured all that out now and am very slowly working on the fine points of the game.

Honestly I think when this fort eventually runs into some unforeseen horror which will more than likely slaughter my dwarves to the last (I still don’t know how to raise an army.) that my next fort will be even better, of that I have no doubt.  I have the knowledge now of what to take at the start and what is just plain silly. There is still alot of stuff that I just haven’t figured out yet unfortunetly, and I’m learning that very slowly. but for now I have a thriving fort and I’m having fun trying out different things and just learning how to do shit.

It is suffering though, generally I find myself consumed by it and then its four in the morning. But mah dwarves! It really is fun though, and I know I’ve been beating around the bush about what kind of game it is but thats hard to say…it’s a city builder with RPG elements…but pretty much every thing else is up to you the player. You make the world how you want, your dwarves are strong and if your will is as well, do it AND STRIKE THE EARTH!

ode to invasive species

I get some kind of sick flavor in my mouth whenever I read about invasive species. I cant help but wonder that with our impressive arsenals and technological advancements we cant exterminate a species of fish or reptiles that threaten our own biological conditions? Really? I mean we seem to do a pretty good job wiping species of plants and animals that have been here for thousands of years, but we cant get rid of giant anacondas in the south?

Now I’m not a hunter by any stretch of the word, in fact I’m on the fence about how I feel about hunting. I can definitely see the appeal but the fact that I would be more than likely hunting something dumber than myself does nothing to attract me, but like I said I can see honestly how some people would find it enjoyable. I do not approve of poaching however and find it both in bad taste and a horrific practice that thanks to we will soon be losing some of our most amazing plant and animal species.

I think I might have an idea for it though, since we spread species of horrible plants and animals across the globe and then they multiply like the plague, we should just put endangered species somewhere else, so that they may multiple and ruin our ecosystems. Sorry endangered sea life you’re pretty much hosed. Imagine majestic elephants on the great plains, maybe they could even kill some of the giant anacondas down in the south.

But seriously there are so many invasive species just here in the US of A that I honestly have lost count. Many just wipe out entire ecosystems and burn people homes to the ground and rape ourwomen. I mean zebra mussels are like the Conan

the Barbarian of the great lakes right now. Here let me mosey on over to wikipedia really quickly and give a sort of quick list.

  • Caulerpa taxifolia –which is some kind of super algae/seaweed which ruins everything in it’s path.
  • Kudzu – Which is a horrifying vine multiplies like crazy and smothers the life out of everything.
  • Japanese Beetles – which devour plant life they come across leaving the Eastern seaboard a wasteland.
  • Fire ants – Look do I even NEED to say anything?
  • Argentine Ants – They have the single largest colony spanning the entire globe in to one giant mega colony.
  • Zebra Mussels – Which have systematically been devouring the Great Lakes.
  • The Northern Snakehead – Starred in a episode of River Monsters. Oh nothing bad can come of it.
  • Burmese Python – I apologize but they weren’t Anaconda’s I’m not going back to try to fix it, it’s done.
  • Wild Boars – I figured they were native and I guess I thought wrong. Somehow terrifies me more.

And I mean that’s just the tip of the iceberg. I could go into Australia, where they have the bright idea for every invasive species that they somehow acquire  (I like to think it’s just the Joker living in Queensland and he think’s it will be funny) that the best solution AFTER the populations have exploded is that you introduce another invasive species to take care of it. The cycle is of course mathematically unending.

I mean just look at what rabbits have done to Australia, and pigs? Oh god pigs. Pigs can actually return to their feral form after only a few generations, it doesn’t even take that long! Pigs basically ruin everything, that’s no joke, what I would kill you for they will definitely do it for less. In fact I’m willing to best most of the invasive species that I listed here and elsewhere would kill you for less OR nothing at all.

Look I’m not a hunter but I would definitely kill some ants with a shotgun. Or some seaweed. But I think what it comes down to is that people are pretty much dumb as hell, I’m actually surprised that people haven’t let giant horrifying wild cats loose. Because honestly I don’t think that Mountain Lions are enough. I mean they have them in Britain they’re called the “ghost cats” and it’s like leopards and shit that roam the country side and kill farm animals. I might not be a scientist or someone who cares heart and soul for animals but I genuinely believe that is not only hardcore but the scariest thing ever.

I wish to hear the lament of your women.

resume oh how I hate thee

There are several things I could honestly say I despise doing, writing out my resume happens to be one of those things. “Oh please no.” I plead with myself, please don’t make me do this. “you don’t understand math” my brain tells me and then it hits me really, really hard. Generally, I have no problem writing about myself if there is no line to be crossed, oh haha very funny. But alas that is not possible to do on a resume because I could get people killed and then I’d probably goto prison, they will tear me up in prison.

I have spent nearly the last maybe four and a half hours rewriting almost the entire thing. It has been a long, grueling task of which my mind feels nearly at it’s breaking point and my body feels slow and lethargic. But I believe I am very close to being what many people call “done.” Now all that remains is to give it to a few people for the once over to complete the final draft.

I’m not very good at spelling certain things, punctuation is not particularly my strong point. I have a penchant for typing much like I would talk, oh how I’m sure Adam is loathe to read my barely human form of English that I speak through a straw. But I will say most of the things I talk or speak about I care deeply about, and my resume is no exception to this rule. I know it’s important to have not only an accurate and appealing resume (which is why I’m still semi furious at UPS for not letting me take the supervisors position because it would look good) for a life long career or just work in general…which I continue to look for.

As the days go by and I watch my bank account begin to suffer (not even close to the halfway mark yet) I cant help but think more and more about me coming out here. I feel bad, honestly really bad about not being able to get a job, I feel bad about piggy backing on Kyle and Leslies back in this. And in the long run it’s just going to continue to do damage to my bank account.

But what can I do? Pray? No thanks. I just got to keep my head up and my mind out of the gutter and I’m sure it’ll all be fine in the long run. I’ve been having a blast out here so far, I’ve met alot of interesting and genuinely neat people out here. I just hope I can catch a break soon.